What If…Kharn was the Hero from the Halo series?

What if Kharn was the hero of the Halo series?

Would the Covenant even be able to provide a challenge?
What would stop him from taking everything over?
Would Sargent Johnson assist him?
Would Cortana ‘choose’ him?

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33 Comments on "What If…Kharn was the Hero from the Halo series?"

  1. AlphaCommando December 29, 2008 at 12:23 pm -      #1

    Well that would firstly require either a massive change in Halo’s very structure that borders in the insane, or some kinda bullcrap multidimensional wormhole theory….

    Either way Kharn is about as far from an actual “hero” (altruistically) as it is psychologically and metaphysically possible to be…..In either case he would go around slaughtering everyone (covies and Humans) for the sake of pure-minded violence and rage.

    Course the games would be a a freaking awesome (but insanely easy) series of levels where you mercilessly and bloodily cut through swathes of elites, grunts and UNSC. Like some kinda sword fighter game that just includes killing everyone in one hit….

    But realistically just based on how the two universes work, the Character himself, and the “needs” of video game players the whole thing is an incomparable mess that doesn’t fit at all….

  2. Sharagran December 29, 2008 at 12:27 pm -      #2

    I think Kharn would single-handedly take out both the Covenant and the Flood, and then proceed to slaughter the remnants of the UNSC just for fun. All in the name of the Blood God.

    Nothing could stop him from taking everything over. Even if they fired the Halo rings in one last suicidal attempt, Khorne would just resurrect his Chosen Champion. I doubt the Halo rings’ pulse would even harm him that much.

    Sergeant Johnson? I only see a small pile of blood and guts, with a cigar sticking out on top…

    And if Cortana decided to ‘choose’ him, it would be the worst mistake she could ever make. Chaos along with Kharn’s sick mind would torture, taint and corrupt her beyond recognition.

  3. Matapiojo December 29, 2008 at 1:17 pm -      #3

    Holy bejesus.

    First, the games would be VERY boring for FPSers given as Kharn doesnt need anything but his Plasma Pistol and Gorechild. The base concept of FPS games is to switch to better weapons and adjust your tactics accordingly. Kharn’s tactic is very simple (although highly effective). Get to the chump shooting at you quick and take his head!

    Second, the games would not have gone past the first. Everyone would be dead. I mean, EVERYONE. Kharn would have killed all the Covenant in the first couple stages. Then his boredom would have had him jumping on humanity.

    Third, if Cortana was uploaded into Kharn’s Chaos Armour, there is a solid chance she would have gone mad (if A.I.s could) with all the warp energies floating in that piece of gear. In addition, any tactical advice given to the Berzerker would be overriden by the desires of Gorechild and the whisperings of Kharn’s dark patron.

    ————————————————

    That said. Lets assume that the situation is not an EXACT switch from how we know the legendary Berzerker. Lets say that Kharn was taken as a kid into the Spartan program instead of John. Meaning that Spartan 117 is Kharn instead.

    I think that this scenario could be fairly amusing.

    First, we have to consider the why of the two universes have merged this way. The only thing I can think of is that Halos “Earth” is a colony in a far galaxy of the Imperium. This world so closely resembled Terra of long ago, that its inhabitants forgot they were a part of a larger galactic empire, and that they indeed beleive this to be the real Terra…Earth.

    The Empire has forgotten this far corner of that removed galaxy, so the Covenant and all the Forerunner stuff is also unkknown to them. In all essense, the world of Halo is unchanged with the exception of a Kharn that was never turned to a Space Marine.

    I beleive the events of Halo would be unchanged but for one particular instance. Kharn’s tactics would have involved a lot of close quarter combat. He would have favored some Human crafted hand-to-hand weapon as well as the Elite and Brute counterparts.

    This activity would have certainly caught Khorne’s attention much like Kharn’s actions in 40k canon at the battle on Terra. Kharn’s luck equivalent to John’s would be Khorne’s indirect graces.

    However, the possible activation of the Halos might create a rupture in the fabric of the universe. Leaving thus an opening for the Warp beings to flood (no pun intended) into this region of the galaxy. The Covenant, the Flood, and Humanity would start feeling the corrupting energies of Chaos, and Kharn would slowly transform from a Hero, to an incarnation of the Villain we know and love.

    Not being a Space Marine would mean very little in this sense because Khorne would just elevate him to Daemon Prince status.

    …and darkness falls in the galaxy at the hands of humanity’s fallen angel.

  4. x on December 29, 2008 at 1:44 pm -      #4

    EVERY THING WILL DIE!!!!

  5. That one dude December 29, 2008 at 5:02 pm -      #5

    Well if he was the “hero” in the halo series i dont think they’d would have made a halo 2 & 3 i say that because there would be nothing left after the halo 1 campaign

  6. L-W December 29, 2008 at 9:32 pm -      #6

    What could I add beyond the ample words of my fellow compatriots?

    First of all the game franchise would no longer be known as Halo, instead it would be renamed to the suitable moniker “Kharn: Kharn Evolved”. The game itself would be completed in two hours, require the use of only one button (Labeled “Slaughter everything in the room”) and would feature only one twenty minute long cut-scene of Kharn uttering abuse at his opponents. Any attempt to activate ‘God’ mode via the console would cause the game to crash, be permanently erased from both the disc and the hard drive and would soon be followed by a letter from the game developers to declare their utter disbelief at your stupidity.

    I estimate that to render and calculate the sheer level of blood spilled, splattered and drank throughout the game would require a Military supercomputer, or several dedicated Consoles working to provide the RAM alone. Upon completion, there would be no credits, just a scrolling list of the people, aliens, animals, household pets, deities and game developers Kharn has killed during the course of both the game itself and the creation of the game.

    Predictably this ‘credit’ sequence would be several hundred times longer than the game itself and would require the entirety of the average hard drive to store.

    – – –

    But within the context of the Halo narrative, how would Kharn fare?

    The Covenant Armada would be turned to scrap, decimated at the helm, with thousands of Cruisers, Frigates, Destroyers and even boarding craft destroyed before they could even be alerted to the presence of Kharn. Entire chunks of what few ground forces that remain would be consumed in Hellfire, the Covenant armed forces would be lain to ruin and their planets turned to ash. The likes of High Charity would be split evenly down the Keel and her denizens would be left to die in the ensuing decompression of the vast artificial planet.

    Any Covenant survivors would have fled long before the passing storm could consume them.

    Likewise, following in his moniker of the “Betrayer”, Kharn would turn upon the UNSC forces and colonies and literally flay them like Cattle. Any humans somewhat close to him throughout the Covenant campaign (Miranda Keys, Johnson etc.) would be reduced to a deranged existence of total madness (Physically and mentally), becoming unholy Heretics and Kharns personal slaves to his will alone. It is here that between the metaphysical grasp of his palm that he would cast aside the human colonies and crush Earth itself.

    So what next for our ‘Hero’? Let’s just say that there’s a rumor abound that the Forerunner MAY still be alive somewhere in the vast expanse of the cosmos; and Kharn intends to pay them a visit.

  7. Space marine December 31, 2008 at 7:06 am -      #7

    Yay khano.
    That would be stupidly easy and a button masher.
    You would see fat people falling over and CATS DOING PEOPLE THINGS.
    Fanboys would be telling the game makers to bring back the chief they “love”……*shudders*

  8. HeroofTime85 December 31, 2008 at 9:15 pm -      #8

    I feel sorry for the covenant. They would have no chance. Kharne would easily annihalate them, then he would kill all of his allies for fun.

  9. Space marine January 1, 2009 at 1:04 am -      #9

    And you also see here.
    IF KHARN CAN BEAT THE ENTIRE HALOVERSE THEN WARHAMMER 40K ABSOLUTLY EATS HALO
    Ehem. That was to show in the arguement in halo vs warhammer 40000.
    Yes.
    The halo franchise would be banned from the market because of Extreme violence and swearing. Both from Kharn and his enemies that when they see him shout OH F$&%!!!!

  10. onesidedfight January 1, 2009 at 1:38 am -      #10

    well, halo would be a flop because the very, VERY thin story of halo would be crushed. Halo fans would wonder what the hell the books had to do with the game, and wouldn’t buy halo, with in response, would cause no interest in mc vs. Earth vadar, so BankGambling would have nothad the abilty to grow, so therefore if Kharne was the hero of halo, this website wouldn’t have been created, so this post wouldn’t have been made.

  11. Space marine January 1, 2009 at 2:25 am -      #11

    Well, This site is moving away from the typical MC PWN’s all. and more variety could overthrow the chief, Kharn may well be the New “MC” Because we all know he does PWN all.

    Also there must be a Kharn vs next to MC vs.
    I hope.

  12. L-W January 2, 2009 at 8:31 pm -      #12

    Excuse me Diana whilst I laugh so hard that I burst my duodenum from fits of hysterics.

    There, all done.

    Admittedly Gravemind would take a fancy to Kharn, he is after all an extremely potent warrior who would not only make a powerful ally, but a virulent host ripe with a genius intellect. But so far Gravemind has made two fatal mistakes concerning the Chaos Champion.

    1) Assumed that Kharn would loyally serve anyone besides Khorne.

    (Probability of enraging Kharn? Very high, he has most likely started to sharpen Gorechild in preparation.)

    2) Gravemind (Like all Flood) has no skull. No skull means no trophy. No trophy means no glory.

    (Probability of enraging Kharn? He has already crashed a nearby star ship into the Flood hive, sterilizing the whole lot of them.)

  13. Space marine January 2, 2009 at 10:41 pm -      #13

    I think Diana has an I Hate warhammer 40000 and everything about it. problem.
    Just because she knows that everything in the halo universe will get PWNT.

  14. Space marine January 3, 2009 at 9:41 am -      #14

    Er…..you put an s at the end of my name. :(

  15. L-W January 3, 2009 at 12:19 pm -      #15

    I take your one minute Diana and I’ll raise the stakes by betting on him killing them in ten seconds tops, in which time Kharn (No ‘e’ on the end) will violently bisect both Tartarus and the Arbiter in two fell swoops of the Gorechild and deter the rest with a quick draw Plasma blast.

    Giving him the remainder five seconds to fire off a single, brilliant and wholly memorable one liner.

    It’s no good making bets against an opponent who can physically react faster than a synaptic never relay can travel; and can split a Space Marine from head crotch in far less than a second.

  16. Space marine January 3, 2009 at 4:33 pm -      #16

    *Kharn One liner
    “IF YOUR NOT DEAD RAISE YOUR HAND!”

  17. Matapiojo January 8, 2009 at 8:34 am -      #17

    “*Kharn One liner
    “IF YOUR NOT DEAD RAISE YOUR HAND!””

    He does not need any other line than his favorite…

    BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!

  18. Matapiojo January 8, 2009 at 8:36 am -      #18

    …well, theres also “SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!”, and “KILL, MAIM, BURN!”, and when addressing Gorechild “FEED!”, but you get the idea.

  19. Space marine January 12, 2009 at 3:40 am -      #19

    rofl, I Like that. Or, “Khorne!,Khorne!, Look at me!, I have killed even more poor saps!!!”

  20. marche January 13, 2009 at 9:47 pm -      #20

    well firsty he would take no damage,secondly the halo games would be horrible due to wepaon selection and how short it would be due to the fact kharn would swing a couple times and scare the covenant off.
    in a way,kharn reminds me of juggernaut form the x-men,except for the fact he isnt unstoppable during charging.

  21. Space marine January 16, 2009 at 2:05 am -      #21

    ” Sry abt tht Space Marine’s’”
    Why do you hate me?

  22. Space marine January 16, 2009 at 2:08 am -      #22

    Can anyone help me with Farcry2??
    I need to find a golden ak-47

  23. L-W January 16, 2009 at 10:24 am -      #23

    Try a place called the “Internet”.

    I heard it has places filled with other people who may or not have the answers to such questions; and may or not have already published such information that would far more efficiently gratify you with the information you seek in a shorter period of time than via this website alone.

  24. Space marine January 16, 2009 at 10:47 pm -      #24

    “Internet”.
    Wrong……Interweb

    Duh.

  25. AJN January 20, 2009 at 8:00 am -      #25

    I know that this is a bit late but

    @ Space marine:
    *Kharn One liner
    “IF YOUR NOT DEAD RAISE YOUR HAND!”

    Oh my god, I was bursting on that one!!

  26. The One Sin January 20, 2009 at 12:45 pm -      #26

    I couldn’t fund this during an internet search, maybe you guys know. If Kharn uses the gorechild, then who has the gorefather?

  27. onesidedfight January 24, 2009 at 10:20 pm -      #27

    a golden ak can be found if you go to the right most side of the first map, countine up or down, depending on how you enter the area, and go untill you find a bus with some diamondes and a jackle tape guarded by some people and go DIRECTLY UP from there untill your gps starts beeping. You should come to a shack with a case of diamondes and a golden ak. rember you have to be almost off the right side of the map to find this. It lasted me for four story missons, one phoneline misson, and two buddie quests.

  28. Space marine January 25, 2009 at 12:44 am -      #28

    Thank you.

    “but anyway i prefer a G-launcher from Mike’s Bar”
    It is a very effective weapon for hunting down arms dealers, They always are in assault cars.

  29. sangheli_special_ops_elite April 11, 2009 at 5:26 am -      #29

    I couldn’t fund this during an internet search, maybe you guys know. If Kharn uses the gorechild, then who has the gorefather?

    I know im really late but gorefather belongs to world eaters chapter master angron

  30. Jack Yoder April 15, 2009 at 5:29 am -      #30

    Kharn would have activated halo… well maybe not he would probably want to do the killing himself even taking that into consideration to even make the game as long as the first halo you’d have to mix all three games, halo wars, and the books… but niether side would survive.

  31. X on December 15, 2009 at 8:24 pm -      #31

    “The Covenant Armada would be turned to scrap, decimated at the helm, with thousands of Cruisers, Frigates, Destroyers and even boarding craft destroyed before they could even be alerted to the presence of Kharn. Entire chunks of what few ground forces that remain would be consumed in Hellfire, the Covenant armed forces would be lain to ruin and their planets turned to ash. The likes of High Charity would be split evenly down the Keel and her denizens would be left to die in the ensuing decompression of the vast artificial planet.”

    As cool as this would be, it is all but impossible. Kharn would most likely not even kill more then a million before dying.

  32. SinZero January 25, 2010 at 5:30 pm -      #32

    “As cool as this would be, it is all but impossible. Kharn would most likely not even kill more then a million before dying.”

    Heretic. At a million kills he has just barely warmed up and is ready for the main course. Bring lots of friends and lots of heavy tech, can’t have that blood flow stop pumping.

  33. Richard Rider July 5, 2013 at 2:05 pm -      #33

    I think it would be much funner to play Halo as Kharn then Master Chief.

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